Sollux Captor ♊ taciturnAnalyst (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
antisocial) wrote2011-08-28 09:07 pm
antisocial) wrote2011-08-28 09:07 pm
(no subject)
-- annihilativeAmor [AA] began trolling taciturnAnalyst [TA] --
AA: sollux we need to speak right now
TA: Oh for 2hiit'2 2ake are you 2eriiou2ly tryiing two talk wiith me when we both know II don't want anythiing two do with you?
TA: II knew you were a cocky biitch but II diidn't thiink you were thii2 2tupiid. Fuck off.
AA: cram it you miserable excuse for a blueblood this is important
AA: i know its you
TA: Excu2e me? You know iit'2 me?
TA: Congratulatiion2! After 2weep2 of conver2atiion you've fiinally realiized that the handle II've been 2ayiing ii2 miine ii2 actually miine.
TA: IIf II weren't bu2y doiing actual iimportant thiing2 II'd 2end you a medal.
AA: we both know that even you arent as dense as youre pretending to be right now
AA: its been you keeping them away
TA: II have no iidea what you're talkiing about. 2top wa2tiing my tiime before II block you for real.
AA: every lag every glitch every unexplained disconnection
AA: its been you
AA: i cant believe that its taken me this long to realize it
AA: i mean to my credit even with your technological prowess youre the unlikeliest of culprits
AA: have you ever even left your hive since that eyesore was constructed
AA: even now i still find it difficult to swallow that youd actually be so proactive
TA: ...ii2 that all you wanted? Two 2top by and tell me that you fiinally fiigured out that the hacker next door wa2 the one keepiing you from feediing that mon2tro2iity?
TA: II have better thiing2 two do than lii2ten two you gloat over haviing fiinally achiieved the mental capaciity of a two 2weep old.
AA: no i want to get answers from you
AA: because while the how and who has been illuminated for me the why is still shrouded in darkness
AA: why did you think it was any of your business to interfere with the natural order of things
AA: those trolls were lucky to come so close to a creature of such high blood
TA: 2pare me the 2elf-ab2orbed hoofbea2t2hiit for once iin your liife, would you? IIf iit'll 2hut you up II'll tell you why II spent all of fiive miinutes every day keepiing you off the iinternet.
TA: II don't giive a 2hiit about the ca2te 2y2tem, II don't giive a 2hiit about troll 2ociiety. Everyone ii2 equally the wor2t kiind of fuckup, iincluding me.
TA: E2peciially me.
TA: 2o II don't buy that crap about the hemo2pectrum giiviing you free reiign two ruiin people'2 liive2.
TA: IIt'2 your fault for liiviing clo2e enough two me that II can hear them 2cream.
TA: 2o there you go. Bad real e2tate choiice2 are the cau2e of your problem.
AA: oh my goodness
AA: sollux i never knew that you were actually so fond of people deep down
AA: its actually kind of precious how youre trying to protect them from me especially when we both know you arent even remotely capable of accomplishing the task
AA: youre like some kind of misanthropic hero trying to slay a dragon without leaving his hive
AA: i dont think ive ever heard something more hilariously pathetic
TA: Are we fuckiing done here? Can II move on wiith my liife and block you liike II 2hould have iin the begiinniing?
AA: were almost there i just have one more demand
AA: youll stop
TA: Liike fuck II wiill.
AA: excuse me did you just refuse a direct order from me
TA: Excu2e me, diid you ju2t go bliind and become unable to read my reply? Fiigure iit out for your2elf what iit mean2.
AA: i cant believe this youre really going to keep doing it
AA: ive just told you that ive uncovered your little conspiracy and that it wont work and youre still going to keep harassing me
AA: you socially stunted little insect you first class candidate for culling
AA: youll regret this
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] has stopped trolling taciturnAnalyst [TA] --
TA: ...ehehehehe.
Aradia rolled her chair back from her computer with a frustrated shriek, just barely fighting back the urge to smash the nearest object against the wall. She was an aristocrat, she was mature, she was better than this. The mantra helped calm her rage down to a manageable level, but it didn't stop her from letting loose a string of incredibly unladylike curses directed at one Sollux Captor. How could someone higher up the hemospectrum than her be so frustrating?
He would have to be dealt with, of course. Nobody jerked her around like a wriggler's plaything, especially a misanthropic shut-in who'd probably never been out in the moonlight for more than five minutes. Aradia's hand instinctively wandered to her seven pupiled eye, then suddenly retracted.
No. She had a better idea than simple violence. Something that she knew would destroy him.
A nasty little smile played across her lips as she rolled back to her computer and pulled up a fresh memo board. Thank the ancestors for a troll's natural instability, especially the instability of a certain insufferable asshole.
annhilativeAmor [AA] opened PRIVATE LINEAR bulletin board BLUEBLOOD LEARNING SESSION.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AA opened memo on board BLUEBLOOD LEARNING SESSION.
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added censuredTraitor [CT] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added tranquilCatalyst [TC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added corruptedAptitude [CA] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added creatureCorralling [CC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added adventurousTraveler [AT] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added curmudgeonlyGaffe [CG] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added affectionateClairvoyant [AC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added taciturnAnalyst [TA] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added augustGamer [AG] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added garrotingContumacious [GC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added generousAutocrat [GA] to the memo --
CG: ALRIGHT, I'LL BE THE FIRST TO ASK WHAT'S UNDOUBTEDLY A COLLECTIVE QUESTION: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BOARD AND WHY THE HELL DID YOU FEEL THE NEED TO FILL IT WITH US?
AA: id just realized the other day how ignorant you all are
AA: you claim to be friends with sollux but really dont know anything at all about him
AA: so i put together this memo so i could graciously fix the problem
TA: Fiix the
TA: Aradiia don't you dare.
AA: hush now
AA: this sort of shyness is exactly why you need someone more capable to manage your social circle
AA: now lets begin
TA: II'm goiing two 2hut thii2 fuckiing board down, je2u2 fuck.
AA banned all others from responding to the memo.
AA: there now maybe i can have a moment to actually talk
AA: first of all you dont even know where sollux lives
AA: well luckily for you all hes my next door neighbor so now you can come visit him anytime
AA: if you dont know where my hive is id be more than happy to give you directions
AA: of course youll probably have some difficulty getting into his hive since hes put up a very sophistacted security system
AA: he thinks that all of you are going to kill him someday isnt that silly
AA: not that it matters much since he doesnt get out much
AA: why i dont think ive seen him out of that hive since we were three at most
AA: he spends all his time with his computers poor thing
AA: but thats just the tip of the iceberg
AA: if you do miraculously manage to garner yourself a face to face meeting youll notice he has this hideous pair of sunglasses on all the time
AA: thankfully they arent a fashion statement but a poor attempt to shield his deformity
AA: his eyes are the same color as his glasses isnt that shocking
AA: just imagine such a high blood with red and blue eyes its really quite a scandal
AA: ive always been amazed hes managed to evade being culled what with how he doesnt contribute anything more than taking up valuable space on the planet
AA: but im sure that as his friends you all dont care about that at all do you
TA: 2HUT UP 2HUT UP 2HUT UP
AA: how are you replying i banned everyone from replying to this
TA: YOU 2ADII2TIIC BIITCH JU2T 2HUT THE FUCK UP AND GET OUT
-- taciturnAnalyst [TA] has deleted this memo. --
There was screeching floating in through Sollux's windows. He supposed that meant that his virus had reached Aradia's hive and obliterated her computer. Normally such a success would give him a brief flicker of satisfaction, but today it barely registered through the waves of blind panic hitting him. He'd been so careful and cautious and now everyone knew everything about him they were going to come kill him like he'd known they would oh god oh god.
A few hours later his concerned lusus found him still curled up into a ball on his computer chair, shaking and trying to keep himself from screaming. Everything was ruined and deep down he knew that he'd done it all to himself.
It seemed that he failed at being a hero as much as everything else.
AA: sollux we need to speak right now
TA: Oh for 2hiit'2 2ake are you 2eriiou2ly tryiing two talk wiith me when we both know II don't want anythiing two do with you?
TA: II knew you were a cocky biitch but II diidn't thiink you were thii2 2tupiid. Fuck off.
AA: cram it you miserable excuse for a blueblood this is important
AA: i know its you
TA: Excu2e me? You know iit'2 me?
TA: Congratulatiion2! After 2weep2 of conver2atiion you've fiinally realiized that the handle II've been 2ayiing ii2 miine ii2 actually miine.
TA: IIf II weren't bu2y doiing actual iimportant thiing2 II'd 2end you a medal.
AA: we both know that even you arent as dense as youre pretending to be right now
AA: its been you keeping them away
TA: II have no iidea what you're talkiing about. 2top wa2tiing my tiime before II block you for real.
AA: every lag every glitch every unexplained disconnection
AA: its been you
AA: i cant believe that its taken me this long to realize it
AA: i mean to my credit even with your technological prowess youre the unlikeliest of culprits
AA: have you ever even left your hive since that eyesore was constructed
AA: even now i still find it difficult to swallow that youd actually be so proactive
TA: ...ii2 that all you wanted? Two 2top by and tell me that you fiinally fiigured out that the hacker next door wa2 the one keepiing you from feediing that mon2tro2iity?
TA: II have better thiing2 two do than lii2ten two you gloat over haviing fiinally achiieved the mental capaciity of a two 2weep old.
AA: no i want to get answers from you
AA: because while the how and who has been illuminated for me the why is still shrouded in darkness
AA: why did you think it was any of your business to interfere with the natural order of things
AA: those trolls were lucky to come so close to a creature of such high blood
TA: 2pare me the 2elf-ab2orbed hoofbea2t2hiit for once iin your liife, would you? IIf iit'll 2hut you up II'll tell you why II spent all of fiive miinutes every day keepiing you off the iinternet.
TA: II don't giive a 2hiit about the ca2te 2y2tem, II don't giive a 2hiit about troll 2ociiety. Everyone ii2 equally the wor2t kiind of fuckup, iincluding me.
TA: E2peciially me.
TA: 2o II don't buy that crap about the hemo2pectrum giiviing you free reiign two ruiin people'2 liive2.
TA: IIt'2 your fault for liiviing clo2e enough two me that II can hear them 2cream.
TA: 2o there you go. Bad real e2tate choiice2 are the cau2e of your problem.
AA: oh my goodness
AA: sollux i never knew that you were actually so fond of people deep down
AA: its actually kind of precious how youre trying to protect them from me especially when we both know you arent even remotely capable of accomplishing the task
AA: youre like some kind of misanthropic hero trying to slay a dragon without leaving his hive
AA: i dont think ive ever heard something more hilariously pathetic
TA: Are we fuckiing done here? Can II move on wiith my liife and block you liike II 2hould have iin the begiinniing?
AA: were almost there i just have one more demand
AA: youll stop
TA: Liike fuck II wiill.
AA: excuse me did you just refuse a direct order from me
TA: Excu2e me, diid you ju2t go bliind and become unable to read my reply? Fiigure iit out for your2elf what iit mean2.
AA: i cant believe this youre really going to keep doing it
AA: ive just told you that ive uncovered your little conspiracy and that it wont work and youre still going to keep harassing me
AA: you socially stunted little insect you first class candidate for culling
AA: youll regret this
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] has stopped trolling taciturnAnalyst [TA] --
TA: ...ehehehehe.
Aradia rolled her chair back from her computer with a frustrated shriek, just barely fighting back the urge to smash the nearest object against the wall. She was an aristocrat, she was mature, she was better than this. The mantra helped calm her rage down to a manageable level, but it didn't stop her from letting loose a string of incredibly unladylike curses directed at one Sollux Captor. How could someone higher up the hemospectrum than her be so frustrating?
He would have to be dealt with, of course. Nobody jerked her around like a wriggler's plaything, especially a misanthropic shut-in who'd probably never been out in the moonlight for more than five minutes. Aradia's hand instinctively wandered to her seven pupiled eye, then suddenly retracted.
No. She had a better idea than simple violence. Something that she knew would destroy him.
A nasty little smile played across her lips as she rolled back to her computer and pulled up a fresh memo board. Thank the ancestors for a troll's natural instability, especially the instability of a certain insufferable asshole.
annhilativeAmor [AA] opened PRIVATE LINEAR bulletin board BLUEBLOOD LEARNING SESSION.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
AA opened memo on board BLUEBLOOD LEARNING SESSION.
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added censuredTraitor [CT] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added tranquilCatalyst [TC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added corruptedAptitude [CA] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added creatureCorralling [CC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added adventurousTraveler [AT] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added curmudgeonlyGaffe [CG] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added affectionateClairvoyant [AC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added taciturnAnalyst [TA] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added augustGamer [AG] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added garrotingContumacious [GC] to the memo --
-- annhilativeAmor [AA] added generousAutocrat [GA] to the memo --
CG: ALRIGHT, I'LL BE THE FIRST TO ASK WHAT'S UNDOUBTEDLY A COLLECTIVE QUESTION: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BOARD AND WHY THE HELL DID YOU FEEL THE NEED TO FILL IT WITH US?
AA: id just realized the other day how ignorant you all are
AA: you claim to be friends with sollux but really dont know anything at all about him
AA: so i put together this memo so i could graciously fix the problem
TA: Fiix the
TA: Aradiia don't you dare.
AA: hush now
AA: this sort of shyness is exactly why you need someone more capable to manage your social circle
AA: now lets begin
TA: II'm goiing two 2hut thii2 fuckiing board down, je2u2 fuck.
AA banned all others from responding to the memo.
AA: there now maybe i can have a moment to actually talk
AA: first of all you dont even know where sollux lives
AA: well luckily for you all hes my next door neighbor so now you can come visit him anytime
AA: if you dont know where my hive is id be more than happy to give you directions
AA: of course youll probably have some difficulty getting into his hive since hes put up a very sophistacted security system
AA: he thinks that all of you are going to kill him someday isnt that silly
AA: not that it matters much since he doesnt get out much
AA: why i dont think ive seen him out of that hive since we were three at most
AA: he spends all his time with his computers poor thing
AA: but thats just the tip of the iceberg
AA: if you do miraculously manage to garner yourself a face to face meeting youll notice he has this hideous pair of sunglasses on all the time
AA: thankfully they arent a fashion statement but a poor attempt to shield his deformity
AA: his eyes are the same color as his glasses isnt that shocking
AA: just imagine such a high blood with red and blue eyes its really quite a scandal
AA: ive always been amazed hes managed to evade being culled what with how he doesnt contribute anything more than taking up valuable space on the planet
AA: but im sure that as his friends you all dont care about that at all do you
TA: 2HUT UP 2HUT UP 2HUT UP
AA: how are you replying i banned everyone from replying to this
TA: YOU 2ADII2TIIC BIITCH JU2T 2HUT THE FUCK UP AND GET OUT
-- taciturnAnalyst [TA] has deleted this memo. --
There was screeching floating in through Sollux's windows. He supposed that meant that his virus had reached Aradia's hive and obliterated her computer. Normally such a success would give him a brief flicker of satisfaction, but today it barely registered through the waves of blind panic hitting him. He'd been so careful and cautious and now everyone knew everything about him they were going to come kill him like he'd known they would oh god oh god.
A few hours later his concerned lusus found him still curled up into a ball on his computer chair, shaking and trying to keep himself from screaming. Everything was ruined and deep down he knew that he'd done it all to himself.
It seemed that he failed at being a hero as much as everything else.